Monday, September 25, 2006

Holy Crap!!!

Happy Two Year Anniversary Blog!!! Has it been that long??? WTF?!?!!

On the lighter side of things...

Man, I'm done posting about sad shit. I'm naturally a happy dude. I've just had a spot of bad karma to balance out all the good karma that I've been stocking up on in the past. When I'm down... I turn to an ancient Japanese proverb which always helps me out. It's so easy. Happy go lucky. We are the world. We did. Hyu Hyu Hyu Hyu. Osu Osu Osu Osu. Yatta Yatta Yatta Yatta!!!

Friday, September 22, 2006

ROBOT MAN

The motto of the freaking universe. Get kicked down, keep getting back up. Get kicked down, keep getting back up. Life spits in your spinach and gives you e-coli... you keep trucking for all it's worth, cause somewhere there's a silver lining on some cloud that's just far enough that you can't see it, but you know it's there somewhere. Or do you know??? You keep reading about some kind of silver lining, people keep telling you about it, I think they send out a monthly newsletter reminding people that the silver lining is still out there, waiting to be found... so there must be one, right??? Philosophically speaking... if you believe, then it must exist. So what if you don't believe??? Who knows??? I don't. Life is a pain in the ass. You just take it, just like you take a multivitamin every morning. The one that tastes like the Aerosol Canned Air that you use to pressure dust your keyboard from all that finger funk and stray hot dog bun crumbs, the one that smells like wet cardboard and the rope that the dirty monkeys swing on at the local zoo. You move that huge lump of think cotton outta the way, grab a half inch pill and you choke it down, unknowing of what effects it has on you and your body. You hope that it does all the miraculous things that people tell you it does. Just because you think it might do you some good to keep doing it. You just do it. Hoping for that silver lining. Does it work??? Who knows??? I don't. I just do it. Good old reliable Pawn. Doing what other people tell him to. Jump like a monkey!!! How High??? Eat Poop!!! The green pile or the red pool... wait, I'm allergic to corn, and that looks only half digested. Just kidding, I love corn.... *crunch*chew*swallow* YUM!!! I'm tired of this monotony. We'll see what cards get shuffled to me in the next round.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Rest In Peace Steve Irwin

When celebrities die, I usually don't give a rats ass unless they touched me emotionally, or sexually in some way. So when I heard that The Croc hunter died, I was freaking devastated. That dude was so passionate about what he did, about what he loved and what he believed in. As a kid, I would watch nature shows until my eyes bled. I was quite a bit older when first watched the Croc hunter, but God damn... I was blown away. I thought this guy was freaking nuts!!! But he was freaking awesome as hell. I never saw anyone do what he did... sure, it was insane... but most of the time, it was for the safety and well being of the animal, as well as the people around him. He put his life on the line for conservation, and he risked his life to teach us things about animals that no other wildlife show would dare do. He opened the door for other nature shows in the same vein, and basically brought The Discovery Channel back to life and made it interesting again. He wasn't just "another celebrity" that no one should care about if he died or not. He was the freaking man. He was awesome. Sure he was monkey nuts, but he was monkey nuts for what he loved. He died creating a show for children. Unlike other celebrities, OD'ed on a hotel toilet.. yet celebrated for decades and soon to be milenniums. He died trying to teach you and your kids awesome stuff, and to get them to love nature and conservation and animals and everything awesome on God's green earth. I respect that shit like a motherfucker. Rest in peace Steve Irwin. You were the freaking man.

Friday, September 01, 2006

JOBBERNAUT SMASH!!!

Hmmmm... what to say, what to say. Summer's almost over, and you all know what that means, school and foosball, halloween and turkeys, leaves turning brown and apple pies cooling on window sills, rock fights and herpes outbreaks. Your basic "yearly things that always happens around this time of year". It's planned out like clockwork by chinese astronomists, on huge copper astral maps, and telescopes made out of human bone, forcefully taken from fallen enemy hordes. Anyhoo... updates, updates. Hmmm... I've lost ten pounds overall. I've lost a lot of fat, and replaced with muscle, so I've slimmed down a little... but the war has just started, and operation Bust A Gut is in phase two. I've memorized all of the Hiragana and Katakana charts, and have actually started reading shit that is written in katakana. Most stuff that is written in katakana is basically "borrowed" words from English anyways, so it's basically like I'm reading English anyways, but with different alpabets. I've got a long ways to go... but I'll keep chipping at it like a chumpy champ. Hmmmm... what else??? Oh, school starts next week. I'm working full time, forty plus hours per week, and then attempting to take twelve credits at school as well. I'm taking Astronomy, Philosophy, Business, and Computer Programming. A whole slew of craziness that fits together like ice balls and Mitsubishi Galant special editions with leather interior. Hopefully, I'm not writing about how I want to kill myself on the next update. Maybe next time, I'll have pics or something. Leave a comment.